The Smallville Project: Episode 2.16 – “Fever”
|October 23, 2014||Posted by Jess under Comics, Television, The Smallville Project|
So Rebecca and I did some math and realized that if we never skip another week (unlikely) it’ll still take us four years to get through the rest of Smallville, which is far longer than I want to live a flightless, tightless life, so we’re going to switch to a Greatest Hits kind of schedule, covering episodes that are important for plot or stupidity reasons, with capsule reviews in between. Here’s the first capsule review:
2.16 – Fever:
Martha decides to bury the flour cannister where she hid the Octagonal Disc in the storm cellar (now how will she bake muffins?), unknowingly stirring up kryptonite mold spores (sure), which CGI their way down her throat. A couple minutes later, she collapses and is rushed to the hospital, where Dr. Helen can’t figure out what’s wrong with her – but it’s clear she doesn’t have long. Dr. Helen knows it’s a spore of some kind so she calls in the DCA (which I think is the DC version of the CDC?), who swarm Kent Farm in hazmat suits; Clark gets the ship out of the storm cellar and safely hidden at Pete’s in time, but he’s also exposed to the kryptonite spores, which for some reason have a much slower and less devastating effect on him, the guy who’s vulnerable to kryptonite, than his human mother. Sure.
The DCA finds and confiscates the OD. Meanwhile, Dr. Helen reveals to Jonathan that Martha is pregnant (called it! also that was a million years ago, why isn’t she showing?), and Martha confesses to Jonathan that when the ship opened in the premiere, a white light came out of it that “healed her,” which has gross implications so let’s move on. Anyway, Clark eventually collapses, Jonathan calls Dr. Helen but tells her she can’t take Clark to the hospital, Dr. Helen takes a blood sample and gawks at Clark’s blood under a microscope (I like to imagine all his platelets have little capes), Lex asks a lot of prying questions and is generally nosy and gross. Chloe comes over and reads a super-cheesy letter confessing her feelings to an unconscious Clark, a scene that is elevated far above the writing and direction by Mack’s talent.
In desperation, Jonathan fetches the ship from Pete’s and Mission Impossibles his way into the DCA HQ to get the OD, then turns the ship on in the hospital parking lot, with Clark in tow. The light from the ship heals both Clark and Martha, and it’s all over but the wrap-up: Lana discovers Chloe’s letter to Clark, which is played like some big shock when EVERYONE KNOWS HOW CHLOE FEELS, and Lex has a shady conversation with a shady guy, shadily. Lex, no.
In exchange for a full recap, I present to you some of the highlights of the conversation Rebecca and I had while I watched this episode:
Jess: Lana is basically gazing and smiling at nothing for like 10 seconds until they cut to Clark walking in
Rebecca: If you cut out all the longing distant glares at nothing every episode would be 20 minutes
Jess: Clark collapsing will literally never not be hilarious
Jess: It should happen every episode
Rebecca: Completely agree, it should be the new exploding car
Jess: It’s genuinely the best acting Welling can do
Rebecca: Also I like seeing his big limbs go all akimbo
Jess: Man, I’m just imagining, like, a post-Crisis DCU where all the other stuff played out normally – Clark goes to college, dates a mermaid, moves to Metropolis, meets Lois, etc. – but his adolescence was really this bananas insane
Jess: “Yeah, well, half my graduating class died in freak mutations and accidents, it was weird.”
Rebecca: I mean, it’s basically the Silver Age
Rebecca: “The most powerful being on earth spent 10 years helping people only in 1 town in Kansas”
Rebecca: Finally, Silver Age-level insanity with a post-Crisis tone with a splash of “embarrassed to be about Superman”
Jess: Just what the fans have been clamoring for!
Jess: Clark you dopey sack of potatoes
Rebecca: I do remember enjoying Sick Clark though
Rebecca: I can’t remember how much was schadenfreude