Supergirl Saturday: Action Comics #292, “The Super-Steed of Steel!” and #293, “The Secret Origin of Supergirl’s Super-Horse!”
|August 2, 2014||Posted by Jess under Comics, Supergirl Saturday|
Get ready, gang, it’s HORSE O’ CLOCK.
Okay, so for those of you who don’t know (all four of you), one of the most infamous aspects of the Silver Age, and certainly the thing most often brought up with respect to Supergirl and the kookiness of the era, is: “Supergirl dated her horse.” Which is nicely prurient – “Silver Age Supergirl was a horse-loving perv!” – and if you’re me, you take such things with a grain of salt. Probably, you’re thinking, there’s more to it than that. It’s probably not that weird and creepy.
And in way, you’re right. Supergirl did not, in fact, knowingly date her pet horse. Unfortunately, the full story is perhaps even weirder and creepier.
Our story begins with Linda and her parents going to see a movie about an amazing horse. She’s a leeettle too excited about it:
Goose pimples just thinking about having a horse? You’re sixteen, Linda, not eight.
Linda does in fact fall asleep, and she has the strangest dream:
Gadzooks! A flying horse! But he’s got even more powers than Supergirl, because kryptonite doesn’t hurt him:
There’s some really, really off about Linda’s face in that last panel. Like, she is way too rapturous. And possibly tweaking.
The crazy eyes continue as she peruses a backwards pamphlet over breakfast:
But once they arrive at the Supergirl Ranch, it’s unlikely that Linda’s going to stop thinking about the horse from her dream, because…
Why, it’s the horse from Linda’s dream! But surely he’s just an ordinary horse who resembles her dream stallion, right?
WRONG! He’s a super-horse! And he understands English! HOW CAN THIS BE????!??!!?!1
Well, you’re gonna have to shell out another dime to find out, kids. Sorry.
Ah, here we go. Comet’s origin, and also the creepy explanation for Supergirl’s dreams.
We pick up where we left off, with Linda still out on the Supergirl ranch. She asks Comet for the 411:
P.S. Hey, Linda, you weren’t born on Krypton. You were born on Argo.
One day, the evil wizard Maldor attempts to kill Circe, his magical rival, but Biron shoots an arrow at him, scaring him off.
“A llama? HE’S SUPPOSED TO BE DEAD!”
Circe’s unable to undo her spell, so in an attempt to make it up to Biron, she grants him the powers of the gods: strength, invulnerability, flight, the whole nine. This doesn’t go over too well with Maldor:
Sure enough, poor Biron/Comet is exiled to space, unable to return to Earth, until…
Don’t interrupt, Linda.
Anyway, that’s the basic gist of Comet’s story, except for a couple creepier aspects, but before they can get into those, the aliens from Linda’s dream attack Earth. The Supers head off to save the day:
I’m pretty sure that first speech bubble is not supposed to be coming from Linda.
Once again, Comet proves invulnerable to the kryptonite rays, and the invasion is repelled:
So this Superman cameo is clearly just there to forestall getting hundreds of letters from pedantic nine-year-olds smugly asking why Superman didn’t show up to fight the aliens, but it’s hilarious the way it plays out. Just lurch into frame, thought bubble at Supergirl’s back, and lurch out again, Clark. No one needs you.
Now, surely this all can’t be a coincidence, right?
Yeeeeeah. So the reason Linda dreamed about Comet for nights and nights and nights – and woke up tweaking orgasmically in her bed – is because Comet basically mind-controlled her into being obsessed with him. So yes, Silver Age Supergirl was way too into her horse – but only because her horse manipulated her into it. Yuck.
“I cannot tell you now! Because then I wouldn’t be able to perv on you later!” Blegh.
Anyway, it looks like this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship, until…
Oh no! Linda and Comet are being separated! Will she ever seen him again? Like, maybe next week? Probably!